This is the real me.

I was at the Robert Frost farm in Derry, NH this afternoon just walking the trails and relishing in the beauty of the area when I came to my favorite spot--where the two roads diverge in a yellow wood. I had always wanted to take the trail to the left (which looked a lot more "less traveled by" when I was younger haha) but maybe because we were always there with the family or maybe because I was too young to go off by myself, I never did it. But I've thought about it a lot over the years...even dreamed about it...which maybe sounds funny but I think there was something inside me that longed to take that road less traveled by...somehow I knew that would make all the difference. Well...today I finally did it! I think it has always been significant to me because there have been many times in my life when I didn't do things I wanted to do because I didn't fit with the status quo way of doing them...and I would think--well it's never been done that way before, I ha

I just laid in bed for an hour trying to take my Sunday afternoon nap but couldn't sleep. Why couldn't I sleep? Because I had this big smile on my face and couldn't get it off. Why wouldn't it come off? Well I had an amazing day at church today. I realized (not that I didn't know before haha) that I am pretty much NOTHING without God. Maybe that doesn't sound like a very happy thought but when he helps you do and say things WAY better than you ever could've under your own power, it is really REALLY cool. Plus it reminds you how much he loves you and there is nothing better:) "And no tongue can speak, neither can there be written by any man, neither can the hearts of men conceive so great and marvelous things as we both saw and heard Jesus speak; and  no one can conceive of the joy which filled our souls at the time we heard him pray for us  unto the Father." ( 3 Nephi 17:17 ) "The love of God ...is the most desirable above all things....

I was thinking about my former students this morning...especially the most recent ones I just left back in Idaho. Every time we chat on facebook I end up saying "I miss you" at some point in the conversation. So this morning I was thinking -- why do I miss them so much??? Not that I didn't expect to miss them...they were so special to me and I hated to leave them...but what exactly do I miss??? So here's what I came up with--I miss seeing their beautiful faces and the hope in their eyes...I miss seeing the pain too, not because I liked to see them hurt, but because I would know when to pray extra for them...I miss hearing them sing...I miss their music...I miss the small talk...their sense of humor (you never know what you will get!)...their smiles...the difference they made in my day and in my life. They are amazing...every one of them. And I think part of me wishes I could've done more for them as their teacher so I have this longing--this "I miss you"

I just moved back to New Hampshire after growing up here and then being gone for 14 years . . . my first few days found me re-enthralled with the beauty of the place and realizations of "I could live here the rest of my life"-- then thoughts and memories of my old life back in Idaho started to creep into this dream I was living in . . . and I started to miss my old life like crazy!!! My friends, my students, my colleagues, my work . . . mostly my students, I admit:) I was starting to feel almost depressed after a couple days of this (it gets worse the longer you dwell . . .) until I made the decision TO EMBRACE MY LIFE. Embrace it for its newness. Embrace it for it's possibilities. Yes it will be different . . . SO different from my old life. But there is something exciting about change . . . through change we always grow and, if perspective and attitude work together just right, we become better, stronger, wiser, more compassionate. And who wouldn't want that (???) I